Living in Love: Co-Hosts of Tv's Life Today, James and Betty Share Keys to an Exciting and Fulfilling Marriage Paperback - 2011

Excerpt

      When Betty and I married, like every couple, we had certain hopes, dreams, and expectations. I was looking for love and someone to share my life with who really cared aboutme. Betty was looking for love, security, a family, and a home. Even more critically, in some ways she was looking for her identity.
      I’m sure the same is true for you. When you decided to get married, you obviously felt it was worth dedicating your life to. You desired lifelong happiness, joy, and peace with your spouse, and you committed yourselves to each other with your actions, your emotions, and your words. And you both had certain expectations that your needs would be met by this other person with whom you were so deeply in love.
      I like to illustrate this point by telling of a journey Betty and I took with our son, Randy, one autumn to see the beauty of the aspens as they changed colors in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. To get to a spot that offered a great view, we had to drive on a steep, narrow mountain road that twisted and turned as it climbed through the Rockies. The traffic was extremely heavy. Randy was at the wheel, and without warning the car began to vibrate. He fought to keep the car on the road as it tried to veer right, toward a concrete barrier. There was no shoulder to the roadway, just a retaining wall, so Randy stopped the car safely in the middle of our lane. We realized then that we’d had a blowout on our right front tire, and now we were stuck. Traffic was flowing steadily to our left, and to the right a long line of cars was merging onto the highway just ahead of us. But an immediate danger came from our being stopped in the middle of the road. What if someone hit us from behind?
      And then a miracle happened. Instead of an eighteen-wheeler bearing down on us with no chance of stopping, a police car pulled up behind us. The officer parked his car at an angle and turned on his flashing lights to alert drivers approaching from the rear that they had to go around us. The policeman stayed there the entire time we were stuck and protected us from harm.
      Here’s my point: Maybe you have a great marriage, or maybe your marriage is suffering. Maybe you’re single and praying that God will send the right person your way. Maybe you’re engaged and wondering what you’re getting into. Regardless of whether you are in or out of a relationship, you have some ideas of what a marriage should look like.
      When you get married, you expect it to be a wonderful journey. You expect to see the most beautiful things that life has to offer, like the stunning autumn leaves we were on our way to view in Colorado. But I can guarantee that somewhere along the way your relationship will stop running smoothly. Maybe you’ll have a blowout or maybe just a slow leak. But eventually you’ll have a flat tire on your marriage journey.
      The challenge to your relationship might come on a winding mountain road, on an eight-lane superhighway, or on the neighborhood streets of daily life. But no matter where or when it happens, an unexpected test always comes.
      Will you fall into worry about being hit by traffic and get so worked up that you can’t do anything to fix the problem? That’s just going to get you run over.
      Will you try to ignore the problem and keep going?
      Will you get mad and blame the car for not moving you forward? That would be pointless anger.
      Or will you trust the Protector, who’s looking out for your marriage, and take the necessary action to get your relationship back on track?
      Only you can decide.
      When our tire blew out on that mountain road, we quickly realized that we had to get it fixed. And even though a policeman was protecting us, he couldn’t fix the tire for us—we had to do it ourselves.
      Because of the circumstances on that mountain road, we had trouble getting the spare tire out, so we wound up having our car hauled to a tire store. The police officer followed us all the way there.
      As it turned out, it was a good thing we went to that tire store. When the manager looked at the other tires on our car, he noticed they were all worn and the sidewalls were weather cracked, conditions which were difficult to detect without putting the car on a lift. The tires could have blown out at any time. In order to stay safe and get our car back on the road to see those marvelous autumn leaves, we had to replace all the tires.
      Many people marry with high expectations about experiencing the various colors of life, but a blowout can endanger the entire journey.When you have a blowout in your marriage, you may need to go to a professional counselor to get the other tires in your relationship checked. Sometimes those tiny undetected cracks create hazardous driving conditions.
      Betty and I have always had a commitment to see things through, no matter what. You may be in a great relationship like that, or you may feel as if you’ve compromised. You may think that you’ve brought too much baggage along or that the past mistakes of your partner are too great to overcome. Or you may feel as if the wheels have come off your marriage.
      I’m telling you that with God on your side and with a heart-determined effort on your part, all things are possible. You can get your marriage relationship back on the road to fulfillment—even if you have to replace all four tires. With a clear commitment to God and to each other, you can learn how to endure the difficulties and trials of your relationship. You can come to realize that those challenges are not the end of your love; they are simply a new mountain you can climb, if you desire to do so. Instead of looking at your difficulties as ruts or roadblocks, view them as opportunities to make your marriage even better.
      In God you have a Protector who has your best interests at heart, and helpers are available along the way to assist you in repairing all the damages in your marriage. Don’t give up! If possible, find help before your relationship blows up. As you read this book, you will discover that all things are possible with God.
      If you’re at the beginning of your marriage or looking forward to the day when you will be married, we trust you will find some ingredients here, some building blocks that are critically important for establishing a thriving marriage from the get-go.
      If you’ve been married for several years, let me encourage you that real change is still possible and improvement is sheer joy. The essential components of a thriving marriage can be put in place at any point and at any time in a marriage relationship. If you’re willing to do what it takes, it’s never too late to start doing the right thing…and enjoy living in love.

Media reviews

Praise for Living in Love

“This is a terrific book on marriage from two people who know what they’re talking about. They have earned the right to speak, and we are blessed indeed to listen.”
     —BETHMOORE, author of So Long, Insecurity: You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us

“James and Betty must know something. Spend any moments near them, and you quickly detect, and enjoy, an uncommon affection. I pray that we learn from their experience.”
     —MAX LUCADO, pastor and best-selling author

“It has been said a good marriage is a blessing to the world. I do believe those who read their book will find this to be true in James and Betty’s own union. We can all learn from their experience, and we thank them for that.”
     —ROBERT DUVALL, actor

“We appreciate the way James and Betty Robison relate to each other with such respect and dignity. They are the same people on- and off-camera, and that is the test of a quality marriage. We know you will love Living in Love, because here they reveal the secrets behind their beautiful story and great marriage.”
      —JOHN and STASI ELDREDGE, authors of Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul and Love and War: Finding the Marriage You’ve Dreamed Of

“I’ve known James and Betty Robison for years, and they’re the real deal. Their book is more than the real deal. They were so vulnerable in sharing their own struggles. Anyone who has ever asked themselves “Is this marriage working? Is it worth it?” will embrace this book and will embrace James and Betty as they share from the heart God’s plan for marriage. What a great job they did on this book!”
     —DR. KEVIN LEMAN, New York Times best-selling author of Have a New Kid by Friday, Have a New Husband by Friday, and Have a New You by Friday

“James and Betty are one of the couples I love and admire most in this world. I have had the joy of sharing many meals and deep conversations with them and always come away richer and closer to Christ. In a world where relationships are crumbling at an unprecedented rate, James and Betty share what they have lived and continue to live. This wisdom is priceless!”
     —SHEILA WALSH, author and Women of Faith speaker

“James and Betty Robison do a fine job teaching together and making their book on the challenges of marriage come alive. The honesty, the transparency, and the practical biblical insights and application make this book easy to understand. It will make a great gift for anyone in a marriage or soon to be wed.”
     —DR. CHARLES STANLEY, senior pastor, First Baptist Atlanta, and founder and president, In Touch Ministries

“In Living in Love, James and Betty Robison share their fifty-year endearing love story of hope, commitment, endurance, perseverance, and passion. Their marriage is a real-life example of what living out a covenant marriage looks like. Their testimony challenges us to the core, continually reminding us to press on in our marriage and never give up.”
      —JEFF and CHERYL SCRUGGS, authors of I Do Again: How We Found a Second Chance at Our Marriage—and You Can Too

“I cannot think of anyone more equipped to write a book on marriage than James and Betty Robison. Along with my own parents’ marriage, theirs has made an indelible imprint on my life. As we’ve shared dinner and conversations,
I’ve been enthralled to watch their adoring smiles, caring touches, and intimate exchanges. Indeed, this is a marriage to behold. I’m so glad they’ve chosen to give insight that will help us all build solid marriages of our own. Read and be blessed.”
     —PRISCILLA SHIRER, author and Bible teacher

“James and Betty are an authentic couple who have a tremendous heart for God and a great love for each other. My wife, Katie, and I can tell by being around them how much they enjoy each other’s company. The personal examples in Living in Love illustrate that they are a real couple dealing with real challenges. They let God’s light shine through their marriage and demonstrate that, with God, couples can work through anything.”
      —JOSH HAMILTON, all-star outfielder of the Texas Rangers

“James and Betty Robison have provided every married couple with a solid tool to develop and maintain a marriage that will stand the test of time, trouble, trials, and tribulations. Living in Love is a must-read for couples who believe that God knew what He was doing when He created marriage and who want to see that purpose worked out in their own relationship.” 
     —TONY and LOIS EVANS, Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship, Dallas

“As their pastor, I know that James and Betty Robison are authentic, sincere, and humble servants of the Lord, and they are most definitely and truly living in love. This book contains the keys you need for an exciting and fulfilling marriage. It has been a tremendous blessing to my wife, Debbie, and me, and I wholeheartedly recommend Living in Love for every couple.”
     —ROBERT MORRIS, senior pastor, Gateway Church, Southlake, Texas

“I’ve seen the marriage of James and Betty Robison up close and personal for over thirty years. Living in Love is from their heart. They have a happy partnership, which has led to a worldwide ministry, yet they have kept their marriage centered on Christ. They have struggled with many of the same issues you and I have confronted, and in this book they share what has worked for them. I highly recommend Living in Love.”
     —RUTH GRAHAM, author of Fear Not Tomorrow, God Is Already There

“This is not a book of just suggestions that might work. It is two lives joined together in love by practicing principles that will work—for any couple! Readers will be inspired by James and Betty’s journey.”
     —DR. GARY SMALLEY, author of From Anger to Intimacy

“I have known James and Betty Robison for years, and I so enjoy being around them. That’s because they always treat each other with love, respect, compassion, and good humor. Their book Living in Love tells us how to do the same. They didn’t come by their great marriage automatically; they worked at it. And they learned valuable information along the way that they want to impart to others. Their personal story will touch you, and their insight will ignite you. This wellwritten book should be read by every married couple and also by anyone who hopes to be married in the future. I couldn’t put it down.”
      —STORMIE OMARTIAN, author of The Power of a Praying Wife and The Power of a Praying Husband